Wednesday, May 30, 2007

A Top Ten List of the Things I Wonder About While Driving or Taking a Shower, Part I

1. If anyone will ever invent tooth whitening coffee.
2. If I’m paying too much for car insurance.
3. What the hell that ex-boyfriend’s problem was.
4. What I should do with all the gobs of money I’m going to have someday.
5. Why it’s called date rape if the perpetrator and victim aren’t really even on a date.
6. Why I spent so much time in high school trying to learn the words to the German version of “99 Luft Balloons” instead of studying.
7. If any of these “Part I” blog entries will ever see a “Part II.”
8. What I was thinking the last time I cut my own hair.
9. Where sexy went, and why everyone’s trying to bring it back.
10. If someday everyone will divide history the way I do: Stuff that happened before the drummer for Def Leppard lost his arm, and stuff that happened after.


Kristen said...

#5: I thought they WERE on a date! (Not that that's any reason to call it "date rape." I have serious issues with that term that I won't go into, here.) But, weren't they? On a date? I thought they had a root-beer float, at least.

JodyReale said...

I think I saw her look at him once. And then leave her root beer float just out there, unattended, that harlot. Sheesh.

Amy said...

The only things I wonder about while driving are things like:

*why does that boob think that driving 40 miles/hour in the left hand lane on a 70 mile/hour interstate is a smart thing to do during rush hour? Are they BEGGING to have someone ram into their car's ass??

*Move, damnit! Move!!

*Jeez Louise, if monkeys could drive they'd do it 1000 times better than YOU, Mr. Ford Explorer.

And while I'm taking a shower, I'm usually thinking about things like:

*Good God. When did THAT stretch mark get there? And WHY??

*I wonder what would happen if I shaved....THIS?

*Did I.....? No, no. I'm sure I didn't., no. I wouldn't do something ridiculously dumb like that.

Just random stuff you know. Your list is much, much more cerebral than mine. I bow to you, in a jealous kind of way.