Twitterverse Curse

Before I begin, I'm going to acknowledge that it's one thing to blog about a dream I had--sure, that's gross enough. It's another to blog about a tweet I wrote while I was dreaming, but that's exactly what I'm about to do. Biz Stone, honey, congratulations. You win.

I've been catching a lot of messages in the media and in more personal communications about why Twitter is--or isn't--the hot new thing. And I guess last night, while I was trying in vain to turn off my brain before going to sleep, I remembered a very unfortunate glimpse I caught of Barbara Walters entering another of her curmudgeonly rants on The View about how she despises the very idea of a medium in which just anyone is encouraged to say just anything. As I lay in bed, I decided there was only one thing that could annoy me more than The View or Barbara Walters. And that's Barbara Walters on Twitter.

Taking what comfort I could from knowing that Barbara Walters will never Twitter, I fell asleep, only to dream that I was a Hollywood movie lackey charged with the task of writing the tag line and some promotional copy for the upcoming thriller, The Curse of the Lesbian Vampire Killers. Deciding to try out some of my first drafts on the Twitterverse, I opened a browser and typed:

"The Curse says there will be blood. About every 28 days. "

The dream didn't last long enough for me to realize the results of my little focus group, and I don't know if this says anything about the validity of social media or not, but I do know one thing: If anyone ever asks me if I Twitter, I can free my tongue from my cheek when I reply, "Twitter? Oh, I do that in my sleep."